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Care Jokes Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Care Jokes" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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I shook hands with a friendly Arab. I still have my right arm to prove it.
Spike Milligan
30 Likes
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We all have that friend that acts innocent but understands all the dir.. jokes.
Unknown
118 Likes
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One of the great things about kids is, they haven't heard a lot of the old jokes. You can get away with the corny ones.
Fred Willard
2 Likes
I saw six men kicking and punching the mother-in-law. My neighbour said 'Are you going to help?' I said 'No, Six should be enough.
Les Dawson
81 Likes
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What's worse than a bull in a china shop? A hedgehog in a condom factory.
Unknown
14 Likes
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I found there was only one way to look thin: hang out with fat people.
Rodney Dangerfield
149 Likes
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You feel lonely not when no one cares about you, but when someone you expect to care doesn't care about you at all.
Ritu Ghatourey
350 Likes
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I don't know. I don't care. It's like if we really cared in high school about like, who won best dressed or who got best eyes, you know. It's just like a popularity contest that we don't really care to run in.
Brendon Urie
34 Likes
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When it comes to past lovers sometimes it isn't worth trying to show them what they lost or what they could've had. Remember, you were always that, they didn't care then and they won't care now.
Unknown
197 Likes
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You are so big, you plays hopscotch like, 'Texas...Alabama...North Carolina...Pennsylvania...'
Unknown
12 Likes
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The fastest way to meet new people is to pick up somebody else's change at a cocktail bar.
Sam Ewing
25 Likes
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I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman where the Self Help section was. She said if she told me it would defeat the purpose.
Dennis Miller
44 Likes
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I once made love to a female clown, and she twisted my pe..s into a poodle.
Dan Whitney
109 Likes
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I had a dream that I was drowning in orange soda. Turned out it was just a Fanta sea.
Unknown
93 Likes
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I had plastic surgery last week. I cut up my credit cards.
Henry Youngman
370 Likes
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I thought that he was taking shots at me, when it was just jokes. It was a misunderstanding, a mis-communication ... I'm about making money.
Soulja Boy
5 Likes
Since it started raining all my wife has done is look through the stupid window. If it gets any worse I'll have to let her in.
Nikhil Saluja
103 Likes
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I believe we should all pay our tax with a smile. I tried...but they wanted cash.
Zach Manal
61 Likes
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The ideal women does exist, but she is always married to another man.
Unknown
102 Likes
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Your momma's butt is so big, she got stopped at the airport for having 200 pounds of crack!
Unknown
61 Likes
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