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Funny Wife One Liners Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Funny Wife One Liners" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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Sometimes I stay up at night, and wonder what it would be like to be with you.
Unknown
54 Likes
Thinking Of Him quotes
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Borrow your wife's pink slippers just to go check the mail and everybody in the whole damn community will stop by to chat. True story. FML.
Donny Norris
16 Likes
Funny quotes
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A quarrelsome wife is as annoying as constant dripping on a rainy day. Stopping her complaints is like trying to stop the wind or trying to hold something with greased hands.
Proverbs 27:15-16
93 Likes
Funny quotes
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A clever wife often sleeps with a stupid husband.
Unknown
608 Likes
Stupidity quotes
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When you see a man opening a car door for a woman it can only mean 1 of 2 things. Either the car is new or the wife is.
Unknown
572 Likes
Funny Facebook Status quotes
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A man explained inflation to his wife thus: 'When we married, you measured 36-24-36. Now you're 42-42-42. There's more of you, but you are not worth as much.'
Lord Barnett
16 Likes
Funny quotes
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A psychiatrist is a fellow who asks you a lot of expensive questions your wife asks for nothing.
Joey Adams
16 Likes
Funny quotes
Women quotes
Wealth - any income that is at least one hundred dollars more a year than the income of one's wife's sister's husband.
HL Mencken
5 Likes
Funny quotes
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At twenty years of age, the will reigns; at thirty, the wife; and at forty, the judgment.
Benjamin Franklin
9 Likes
Funny quotes
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My wife and I had an argument last week that was so stupid, that it bears repeating. My wife collects twist ties...welcome to my world.
Bill Engvall
4 Likes
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I got to work with my wife, Lena Olin, for the first time, which was great. I thought it might be difficult in some way to talk to one's wife in a different way but it was so not forced.
Lasse Hallstrom
0 Likes
Sometimes thinking of you isn't enough...I constantly want you by my side.
Unknown
84 Likes
All I Want Is You quotes
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I could be such a wonderful wife to another wife's husband.
Judith Viorst
15 Likes
Proud army wife to be.
Unknown
28 Likes
Military Wife quotes
When a married man talks in his sleep, it's because he finally has the opportunity to say something without the wife interrupting him.
Unknown
78 Likes
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'I Love My Wife' bumper stickers are strictly for men who were caught cheating.
Unknown
114 Likes
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Don't forget Mother's Day. Or as they call it in Beverly Hills, Dad's Third Wife Day.
Jay Leno
18 Likes
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Summer is the season when a man thinks he can cook better on an outdoor grill than his wife can on an indoor stove.
Unknown
21 Likes
Funny quotes
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Summer is the season when a man thinks he can cook better on an outdoor grill than his wife can on an indoor stove
Unknown
66 Likes
Funny Summer quotes
I recently read that love is entirely a matter of chemistry. That must be why my wife treats me like toxic waste.
David Bissonnette
53 Likes
Funny quotes
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