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Funny Jokes About Weight Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Funny Jokes About Weight" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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QUOTES
Denial ain't just a river in Egypt.
Mark Twain
50 Likes
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How long was I in the army? Five foot eleven.
Spike Milligan
16 Likes
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Hi. Um, my camel called...he wants his toe back!
Unknown
59 Likes
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What do you call a fake noodle??? An impasta.
Unknown
172 Likes
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So I went to the dentist. He said Say Aaah. I said Why? He said My dog's died.'
Tim Vine
18 Likes
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Jokes are better than war. Even the most aggressive jokes are better than the least aggressive wars. Even the longest jokes are better than the shortest wars.
George Mikes
1 Likes
The only thing I gained from 2012 was weight.
Unknown
79 Likes
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The three words women most want to hear from a man are, "You lost weight".
Lori Gottlieb
23 Likes
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When the weight of the paper equals the weight of the airplane, only then you can go flying.
Donald Wills Douglas
2 Likes
The whole thing of weight, I guess it's because there is a wider fascination we all have with weight.
Daniel Day-Lewis
0 Likes
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When it comes to boys and her weight, I think Ellenor is much more conservative than I am, and she has not had the dialogue I have had about my weight.
Camryn Manheim
1 Likes
Gaining weight is like 6393 times easier than losing weight.
Unknown
4 Likes
I can't stand people that don't know the difference between 'your' and 'you're.' Their so stupid...
Unknown
222 Likes
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I've often wanted to drown my troubles, but I can't get my wife to go swimming.
Jimmy Carter
123 Likes
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I thought coq au vin was love in a lorry.
Victoria Wood
80 Likes
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I've got a very poor sense of direction. I keep forgetting which way is forwards.
Geoffrey Parfitt
13 Likes
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I used to have Mad Cow's disease, but I'm alright Nooooooooow.
Billy Connolly
142 Likes
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The fastest way to make your own Anti-freeze is to hide her nightgown.
Unknown
24 Likes
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I'm positive I lost an electron, I better keep an ion that.
Unknown
144 Likes
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There's an old saying - There's No Place Like Home. Well, I went in the house next door, and it was very similar.
Geoffrey Parfitt
35 Likes
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