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Funny Miami Heat Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Funny Miami Heat" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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My goal for 2014 is to accomplish the goals of 2013, which I should have done in 2012, because I promised them in 2011 and planned them in 2010.
Unknown
101 Likes
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I want to kiss you at midnight and pork you at dawn.
Unknown
8 Likes
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All diseases run into one, old age.
Ralph Waldo Emerson
30 Likes
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It would be funny if, while performing an abortion, someone yelled 'abort! abort!'
Unknown
63 Likes
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I know a lot of funny people in a lot of funny places.
John Cougar Mellencamp
13 Likes
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Ive lived most of my life in Phoenix, Arizona, and Im addicted to the desert heat. I have two sisters and three brothers; I loved being part of a big family, and were all still really close. I live down the street from my mom and dad and I talk to them on the phone probably once a day. Ive been married for thirteen years to a boy I grew up with, and we now have three boys of our own. My favorite hobbies used to be reading, drawing, and scrap-booking, but now I mostly just write.
Stephenie Meyer
46 Likes
I wasn't sure if I was allergic to hay or not, I'm from Kentucky and you would think I would know but I didn't. I took an antihistamine and I didn't know that they make your blood thin and your heat race. So I was spending all day screaming and I almost fainted once. Right before I fainted I came to and opened my eyes and I didn't know where I was or who anyone was so I took a breather and started up again. It was almost happening each time and all I knew was that the scream was the intention to get my sister to leave the barn. So when I see it now I know how I felt and what I was trying to do. It was so scary for me how I was feeling that it scares me now.
Jennifer Carpenter
7 Likes
People say laughter is the best medicine. Your face must be curing the world.
Hussein Nishah
303 Likes
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I haven't had s.. in so long I am considering becoming a born again virgin.
Ryan Swain
157 Likes
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I know that somewhere in the Universe exists my perfect soul mate, but looking for her is much more difficult than just staying at home and ordering another pizza.
Shubham Joshi
170 Likes
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A friend is 1% funny, 2% sweet, 3% caring, 4% loving, 90% good looking. Thats why I am your friend! You are so lucky.
Unknown
549 Likes
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I aint a redneck 'cause I talk American real good!
Alec Straub
164 Likes
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Your annual booze-fueled New Year's Eve spectacle will surely inspire us all to drink less in 2014.
Unknown
3 Likes
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Lets attend an opulent New Year's Eve party so we can briefly ignore the horror of our impending poverty.
Unknown
6 Likes
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I feel lazy. In fact, I'm feeling lazier than the guy who drew the Japanese flag.
Unknown
164 Likes
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Confucius says Love one another. If it doesn't work, just interchange the last two words.
Hussein Nishah
554 Likes
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On the 12th Day of Christmas my Facebook gave to me, 12 dudes I'm blocking, 11 friends just watching, 10 corny topics, 9 busted barbies, 8 friends complaining, 7 stalkers stalking, 6 party invites, Fiiiiiiiiiiiiive Drama Queeeensssss, 4 game requests, 3 photo tags, 2 friends-a-pokin & a creep who won't stop inboxing meeee!
Unknown
1205 Likes
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Seeing the irresponsibly dangerous stunts in the Spider-Man musical has prepared me for your New Year's behavior.
Unknown
8 Likes
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Behind every successful student, there is a deactivated Facebook account.
Unknown
948 Likes
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If you're a dude and it takes more than 20 seconds to take of your jeans because it's tight,You Gay !
Boat_Grandberry
51 Likes
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