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Funny Grade 8 Graduationault Quotes & Sayings
Showing search results for "Funny Grade 8 Graduationault" sorted by relevance. 500 matching entries found.
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Christmas is a time when you get homesick...even when you're home.
Carol Nelson
103 Likes
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Why do single women take advice from other single women? That's like Stevie Wonder giving Ray Charles driving directions.
Hussein Nishah
350 Likes
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A good wife comes from God and a good husband comes from the bank.
Evans Amecha
51 Likes
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Before s.... you help each other get naked, after s.. you only dress yourself. Moral of the story: in life no one helps you once you're fu..ed.
Unknown
2197 Likes
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It's a recipe for disaster when your country has an obesity epidemic and a skinny jean fad.
Unknown
842 Likes
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Spent the entire night trying to create a website for women drivers, but it kept crashing.
Unknown
696 Likes
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This year, I'm going to buy all of my Christmas gifts from Nike...Made for kids by kids.
Unknown
51 Likes
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There should be a relationship status for I don't even know whats going on.
Unknown
38 Likes
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I can't believe it's been a year since I didn't become a better person.
Unknown
20 Likes
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The most unfair thing about life is the way it ends. I mean, life is tough. It takes up a lot of your time. What do you get at the end of it? A Death! What's that, a bonus? I think the life cycle is all backwards. You should die first, get it out of the way. Then you live in an old age home. You get kicked out when you're too young, you get a gold watch, you go to work. You work forty years until you're young enough to enjoy your retirement. You do drugs, alcohol, you party, you get ready for high school. You go to grade school, you become a kid, you play, you have no responsibilities, you become a little baby, you go back into the womb, you spend your last nine months floating... ...and you finish off as an orgasm.
George Carlin
168 Likes
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My 'check engine' light came on while driving to work this morning. I looked and the engine is still there.
Unknown
546 Likes
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Dear Crush, don't be scared if a fat guy in a red suit snatches you away on Christmas Eve. Sincerely, You Were On My Wish List.
Unknown
229 Likes
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Don't steal, don't lie, don't cheat, don't sell drugs. The government hates competition.
Hussein Nishah
526 Likes
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I just saved a bunch of money on my car insurance by switching...my car into reverse and driving away from the accident.
Unknown
563 Likes
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Christmas is the season when you buy this year's gifts with next year's money.
Unknown
41 Likes
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Facebook's timeline is my favorite way to watch girls from high school get fat.
Unknown
723 Likes
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Dear Santa, Please send your credit card numbers. its only fair since youre getting the credit for the gifts, that you should start paying for them also...
Unknown
59 Likes
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Dear Bad Kid In School, Please don't take your education for granted. It may not seem like a big deal to skip a few classes or get a few bad grades, but it is a big deal. If you don't give your all it'll haunt you in the future. Take it from me someone who used to think and act the same way. One day you will look back and think man I should of did better in school. The reality of life hits you hard when you become an adult. Believe me your not gonna go far without a good education. So skipping that class and taking that bad grade may seem okay now. Later it won't be okay it'll be to late.
Unknown
210 Likes
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I dont make enough money to go on vacation, so I'm just going to get drunk this weekend until I dont know where I am.
Unknown
382 Likes
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A drunken man was dreaming that he died and reincarnated on earth as a chicken. He became heavy and tried to lay an egg! He pushed and pushed and laid the 1st egg, then the 2nd. He was pushing to lay a 3rd egg when his wife screamed ''James! You're shitting on the bed!"
Unknown
604 Likes
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